Understanding Male and Female Differences – Pastor Faith Oyedepo
Every couple that must succeed in marriage should understand that they are different individuals, biologically, psychologically and otherwise.
Your understanding of these differences will help you appreciate your peculiarities, which, most times, make up our personality.
When a woman understands the uniqueness of the male gender, she will appreciate her husband better.
This will give her an understanding of why he behaves the way he does, thus eliminating future problems and vice versa. The Bible says: Through wisdom is a house builded; and by understanding it is established: (Proverbs 24:3)
God designed the man to be the head of the union and deposited in him what is required to take on the position successfully.
He was designed to take the lead, while the woman follows. When anyone tries to disrupt this divine arrangement, it poses a problem. This accounts for why the male drive towards everything is higher than that of the female.
Also, every intending couple must understand that your taste for things varies from each other. For instance, while you prefer a particular colour, your spouse might want the other. At times, your preference might be different but that is what makes you unique.
Be knowledgeable about your partners taste for things like food, how to spend leisure, music etc.
The truth is: Some seemingly little things are responsible for misunderstandings in the home and this is where adequate quality communication comes in.
Ladies, you must understand that a real man derives his sense of self-worth primarily from the respect, recognition, and reputation he gets on his job or professional accomplishments. He draws emotional satisfaction from achieving success in business, becoming financially independent, developing a highly valuable skill or craft, supervising others or becoming “boss”, etc.
Men, a woman receives her self -esteem at home by being told she is appreciated when she prepares a good meal, dresses beautifully, keep the house clean or does something worth appreciating. In other words, a woman likes sweet words, feel protected and appreciated, as well as being cared for.
So, while the man craves for respect from his woman, the woman, on the other hand, craves for appreciation. If you do not know all these, you might be making efforts in the wrong direction; which can be most frustrating.
While gathering adequate knowledge about your would-be spouse, you should also bear in mind that knowledge without application is a waste. You must know how to use your knowledge to make your marriage successful.
Another important point you must understand before you say “I do” is that both the man and the woman have a duty to dwell with each other in wisdom.
Marriage must be tended before it can work, and must continue to be tended to continue working. When a man applies wisdom in dealing with his wife based on her nature, they are less likely to encounter problems and vice versa.
Surprisingly, the role of the husband was drawn from that of Christ towards the Church, not from human examples.
Thus, the man must discover the selfless way Christ loved the Church and love his wife the same way by God’s grace.
You must learn to honour your wife. Do not pay evil for evil; rather, no matter the wrong learn to reciprocate in love.
In the same vein, the woman must learn to reverence her husband. Remember I talked about the man’s need for respect; he requires that respect more from you – as his wife.
You must learn to submit and make him feel honoured as your husband. Doing this is one way to walk in wisdom. As the Bible says concerning the woman: Every wise woman buildeth her house: but the foolish plucketh it down with her hands (Proverbs 14:1).
Therefore, you must embrace wisdom for it will bring you honour and promote you from mediocrity to greatness.
It will make your home precious before God and men because your home begins to shine like gold.
However, you must understand that knowing how to apply the knowledge of the Word of God is wisdom.
It will help you know how to speak positive and edifying words to your spouse. Thus, wisdom is the principal thing for success in marriage.