Tips For Successful Parenting – Pastor Sam Adeyemi
The formative years of our lives are spent around our parents, we watch how they raise us, and we literally absorb all that they do and say, not realizing that we are being programmed for parenting.
Its many years later when we have our own children, and our default programming shows up, we realize we are parenting just like our parents. It happens unconsciously.
Parenting values are caught and taught, but more caught than taught.
Many parents have never read a book or attended a seminar on parenting, so it’s that default parenting style that they fall back on; or they experiment as they go along. If we are going to improve on what our parents did, we have to identify the patterns that we learnt from our parents.
First of all, list four or five things you feel your parents got right, the good qualities and values you saw in your parents; also list four and five things you feel they did wrong – this can be a traumatic experience for some because many painful memories flood back in, but this exercise is necessary because it will encourage healing.
It’s important to resolve all the issues of bitterness, unforgiveness and hatred, we must forgive our parents because if we allow the root of bitterness to spring up, it defiles the whole body which creates a chain or new cycles of the same problem.
For successful parenting, you have got to have a family vision so that we can raise a godly generation, children that won’t be an embarrassment to us.
Where there is no vision, the people perish. We must seek for revelation from God concerning our families and run with it, the woman in Proverbs 31 was outlining a vision for her son, preparing him for royalty.
Parents must prepare their children for something higher than survival. It’s been proven that the way a child turns out is not dependent only on IQ but also on how he/she was raised.
Teach your child to pursue goals higher than basic needs, to add value to society rather than focus on survival. Ensure that they are grounded in biblical values. Parents should love each other because it affects the children.
The atmosphere in the home should be loving; it has been statistically proven that children who grow up in broken homes are more prone to crime. Parents should model Christian character and strict obedience to God. This way we would build world champion children.
Remember, decisions determine destiny, we must choose to improve on our parents’ style of parenting, we have got to make choices.