How to Nurture Your Relationship – Pastor Faith Oyedepo
God instituted marriage so that man can enjoy the power of relationship. God saw that the first man – Adam, was in need of companionship. And the LORD God said, It is not good that the man should be alone; I will make him an help meet for him (Genesis 2:18). God wanted it to be for man “as it is in heaven” (Matthew 6:10). So, He gave the man the gift of relationship. This means that God believes in relationships and they are important to Him.
Relationship means “to connect with someone else or to be in touch with someone.” But it is important for you to understand that although God initiated the idea of relationships, it is our duty to develop and sustain it. We sustain our relationship by nurturing it with all the right nutrients necessary for it to grow.
To nurture means to care for, to look after and to take care of somebody or something. You nurture your relationship with your spouse, just as you nurture your baby to adulthood. You should learn to feed and care for your relationship if it must be a success.
The food here does not mean what we eat physically, but there are physical, spiritually and emotional nutrients you must give your marital relationship so that it can grow and be well-nourished.
How to nurture and grow your relationship
I will be sharing with you on certain factors that can help you nurture and grow your relationship with your husband, wife and family members.
Any man or woman who is genuinely committed to God is bound to be committed to the success of his/her home because he/she will endeavour to obey God. Someone once said that what the spinal cord is to the body is what relationship is to your marriage.
The level of your commitment to your relationship with your husband, wife or family members will ultimately determine how heavenly your home will be. For you to be committed to your husband, wife and family members, first and foremost, you must be committed to God if the commitment to your spouse will yield a positive result. For every house is built by some man; but he that built all things is God(Hebrews 3:4).
That means all your efforts to build a heavenly home will amount to nothing without the help of God.
The Bible says I am the vine, ye are the branches: He that abideth in me, and I in him, the same bringeth forth much fruit: for without me ye can do nothing (John 15:5).
Let me say this to singles before you marry any man or woman; ensure that he is genuinely committed to God because if he or she is not, it will affect the success of the home.
I remember my husband (then my fiancé) writing a paper titled “Sailing Under Sealed Orders.” One thing that struck me most in that vow of commitment to God was the phrase, “Christ is either Lord of all or not Lord at all…” I rejoiced when I read and even had to sign that I will allow him to serve God completely and unreservedly. That is why I am not surprised at his commitment to our home, because his commitment to God is unquestionable.
However, commitment to God must find expression in your commitment to your spouse and family members. Commitment to God and to your spouse is like a bicycle. Each wheel represents these two levels of commitments.
Commitment is what drives a man to love his wife despite how he feels or what she has done or failed to do, and it is also a driving force in a woman that is submissive to her husband. Any man you see who finds it difficult to love his wife or makes excuses for not loving her is not committed to making that marriage work.
If you are a stubborn and naughty wife who refuses to submit to her husband, your problem is simply lack of commitment! If you are committed to the success of your marriage, you will not need anyone to advise you, you will willingly and excitedly submit to your husband, and your husband will express his love for you.
A lady once wrote me and said, “I started reading your article in one of the daily newspapers after I got born-again in November 1998. I gained a lot from most of what you discussed in the articles. I am married with four children and used to do many things that were not right for my husband. But as soon as I read your articles, I made a change.
Whenever I want to fight my husband, I remember your article on how to be patient with our husbands, and I stop. You have taught me a lot about marriage, so I don’t miss that newspaper.” It is time to get committed if you desire a heavenly home.